A lot changes in three years. I look back at my old self, the me in high school, and I remember who I was and who I loved. I considered starting a new blog - just someplace to get my thoughts out of my head but I realized that while I am a lot different now and I have new friends and I live in a new city with new experiences, I am still the same. Some things never change.
I still love fall and can feel the changes in the air as I watch the leaves fall off the trees.
I still want to change people and this world we live in.
I still haven't lost my ambition or love of life. I could never walk away.
I still wake up every morning ready to conquer life.
And it seems with this fall, I am falling in love again.
This new me needs a place to be expressive without fear of condemnation and I want to use this recently cleaned up canvas to be raw and unapologetic about who I am. I want to start being honest with myself and with my feelings. I am so done letting everyone else tell me who I am and I am not about to start my adult life out how everyone else thinks is best.
I think it is also time to start a new chapter of introspection - what makes me tick. Honestly, I am terrified of what I am going to find and what I am capable of but how can I take control of my life if I can't even control myself?
So here is new beginnings. Here is to being 21 in less than a month. Here is to unrequited love and all the complications it brings. Here is to family and all the pain they cause us. Here is to family and how no matter how bad things get, they are the ones who will always be there for us. Here is to honesty and knowing ourselves and what we are capable of. Here is to remembering that no matter how much someone means to you, a day may come where they stab you in the back in the name of friendship. Here is to friends, Lord knows we couldn't make it through this life without them.
So let's raise a glass to the new age of adulthood, Let's raise a glass to the raw and unadulterated beauty that is our minds.