December 9, 2011

I admit, I am a writer... (Also known as, Patience is a Virtue and You Can Go On)

As much as I would like to deny it... I am a writer.

Whenever something (or someone) perplexes me, I write about it. Getting my mind on paper helps me to organize my thoughts, see them in order, and analyze what is to be done next. I have been doing a lot of writing lately, and lots of thinking. Seems the older I get, the more that begs me to contemplate. Sometimes it seems to me, contemplation is part of growing up, just a piece of the puzzle, a stage inthe cycle, however small it may be, still important.

A lot has happened in this last month, I turned 17 and my world was turned upside down. While a whole new world can be a good thing, most often I believe it confuses our minds. A new perspective is growing and beneficial every once in a while, but it begs the question, is this the right perspective? This is the single most important question to ask because it itself begs the single most important answer, should I keep this new perspective?

I have found that this new perspective has taken some getting used to, as do all perspective changes, which in turn causes it's own problems. Anything new can be a challenge, and while a challenge can be difficult, not only is it beneficial, but rewarding. Sometimes the hardest things in life are in fact the most rewarding. Maybe not at first will it seem rewarding, but I can guarantee that if it was the right thing to do, it will eventually be rewarding.

I have been learning a lot about patience, and by that I mean a LOT... I have never been good at waiting, and ironically, all this waiting around has been testing my patience. I have been told patience is a virtue, and if it doesn't kill me first I may in fact be better for it. In any case, in the words of an optimist, "What doesn't kill you will make you stronger." This really does beg the question, what kind of strength? Being strong can be being numb to a situation. Strong can be fighting back the tears till you are alone. Stron can mean being stone-hearted. But strong can be so many other things. Strong can be crying with one who is hurting, helping them wipe of their tears, standing up, and walking with them. Strength can be saying no when everything inside you screams yes. Strength can also be leaning on the people around you. For me, strength is getting up when nothing in you wants to, smiling when tears are begging to fall, walking away from the challenge, and picking up the peoe along the way, even though you can hardly keep going yourself. True strength, is when you hit rock bottom, your lowest low, when you have nothing left, crying out "God take me! I can't go on!" Then you lean on Him and He will carry you through.

I guess the entire point of this is, firstly, my apologies for going so long without a post, and secondly, persevere. Patience, they say, will reward you someday, and when you feel like you can't go on, be strong. Life will go on, you will go on, and if you really want to, you can get through whatever life decides to throw at you.

This is all to say, live in today, focus on the step in front of you, and then the one after
that, and eventually, after enough steps, you will be through the day.

Comment away, I do certainly love your comments.

With much love,

Danielle